Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Up close with Joel Madden

The interview of Joel Madden, with Seventeen,com "as is" from the magazine website.


Up close and personal with Joel Madden

Good Charlotte's Joel Madden talks about love, Benji, breakups, and his number one rule for all relationships.

17: Good Morning, your new album, is sort of a revival for the band. Has there been a similar growth in your personal or love life?

Joel: I think I'm just more confident. The main thing I try to have, whether it's in my relationship or in work or a friendship, is honesty and integrity. If you have those things, you don't have to [worry] about what people think. It's great to be in relationships, but they really can't define you. You have to be secure in who you are and what you're doing. The better you are by yourself, the better you can be in a relationship with someone.

You have kind of a tough-guy look. How important is it for girls to see past the exterior of a person?

I think it's just like your mom always tells you -- you can't judge a book by its cover. I don't even see the tattoos when I look in the mirror. They don't make me tougher, they don't make me wild. You could judge my image or whatever, but to get to know me, you have to have a conversation with me and realize that I'm pretty -- I wouldn't say boring -- just average.

You seem to stay on good terms with your ex-girlfriends -- is there a right way to break up?

I will tell you I'm not friends with anyone I've ever dated. I don't believe in that. I believe in leaving on good terms and leaving things clear, with good closure. I need [the girl] to feel that [she was] respected. When you really love someone, you accept them, even if it means that you can't be together. And that's the number one rule for all relationships. Just accept them for who they are and accept that maybe you're not meant to be together.

So how do you realize when a relationship is over?

I think you just grow apart. Maybe you're with someone who's not quite the same as you and you're not as accepting as you were when you first met them. You're trying to change them or they're trying to change you -- [but] you really can't change people. The minute you start trying to change them or they start trying to change you, that's when you should really think, Is this right?

Do you and Benji ever give each other relationship advice?

We're definitely each other's number one go-to person for anything having to do with relationships or love. We always are honest with each other. He's always told me from day one, "Be yourself, and if they can't accept that and they don't love you for who you are, then it's just not meant to be."

Have you guys ever fought over the same girl?

We've never fought over a girl, thank God! We have really different taste, I think. The minute he says he's attracted to someone, for me, there's no possibility. It's really weird. It just kills all possibility. There's no way I could even -- it's a weird brother thing!

When is the right time in a relationship to say I love you?

Love is a whole other game! I think there isn't a right time to say I love you. It's just whenever it feels right. It could be the third time you hang out with someone, it could be months, it could be a year...there aren't rules to that.

It seems like you're such a romantic!

I like romance, I like love, you know what I mean? I need that in my life.
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